Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize