You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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