He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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