Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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