just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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