Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Randomize