the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.