return my video game
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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