Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
