Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
