my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I want to be your penis for a week.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I use my feet as sexual weapons
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
