I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
