Sponge bath it is.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Randomize
