That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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