is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I have peed in a lot of sinks
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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