3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize