Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
why is half of my head shaved?
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