I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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