We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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