If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
