I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Randomize
