yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
