i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
