the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
