Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I party with great urgency now.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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