I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
he thought i was a dude.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
