party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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