Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
