When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
