Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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