So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
