so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
