Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize