Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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