Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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