somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
