i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I have surprise drugs for everyone
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
