So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Are we still banned from the library?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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