he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
