no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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