My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
