In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
