when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
