I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
