belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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