I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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