dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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