y did u give ur computer a hand job?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
