So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
