it's not cheating when I paid for it
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize